Sunday, January 17, 2010

How are relationships affected by abortion?

I've heard so much about the actual process of abortion, but I'm curious about how abortions affect a couple's relationship after. Were you closer? Did you drift apart? Was there mutual relief or grief? Please share your experience. Again, this isn't a question that requires people to bash others for the decisions they've made. I'm just curious about this aspect of abortion.How are relationships affected by abortion?
My husband and I had an abortion. I went through a few days of depression and he was there the whole time through giving me a shoulder to cry on and someone to talk to. He didn't have the same reaction I had but tried his best to understand my feelings and help me move on. I don't know if we necessarily grew closer through this process, we've always been very close, but we haven't drifted apart at all. We live abroad and have always have had to stay strong together to fight the pressures of culture shock, living in a society we don't fully understand, being constantly stared at and judged because of our aparent foreigness. Having an abortion was one of the most difficult things we've ever done, but we've weathered through many other difficult situations, most of them happening while abroad, and I think that's what made the difference. It's really sad to hear about couples who break up after an abortion, but just know that it doesn't happen to everyone.How are relationships affected by abortion?
I often hear about couples splitting up after an abortion. It is a very stressful - physically, emotionally, mentally - time for both, but especially so for the girl. And if the boyfriend was pressuring/advocating for the abortion, then it really creates a huge gap that is difficult to overcome. And if one wanted the abortion and the other didn't, well you can imagine that would tear a relationship apart as well.

Granted all I know of it is anecdotal evidence, typically by younger couples or couples who were already stressed (and the woman wanting an abortion because they'd already broken up).
All the couples that I know who aborted their pregnancy broke up within a year. I had several friends who did this.

The reason they gave is that they started to regret their decision and blame the partner for getting one. This was more true for the women than the men, but a couple of my guy friends felt this way too. I never got one, but trust me, if my significant other wanted me to get one, the relationship would be over quickly, even if I did get one (which I never would).

The thing is that Abortions are gotten out of selfishness, and who would want to be with a selfish person? It would get old being with someone who was selfish. So I think that is why the relationship would dissolve soon after.
umm.. even if you AND YOUR PARTNER believe in abortion, it could ruin your relationship. even though your partner has a big influence in the decision to get an abortion, theres always going to be another, bigger influence that will tell you:abortion is wrong...and most people actually regret having an abortion because having that baby could chcange your positive ways, believe it or not. it could make you realize what life is really like when you have another life to take care of besides that.

I had an abortion 4 weeks ago and my boyfriend at the time broke up with me the day after the procedure. Its hard because when we found out I was pregnant he was excited but we knew what was best for us so we had the abortion then the next day he broke up with me and said that he really didn't want to be tied down to me, hope that helped a little. Good luck
My bf and i did one about 2 yrs ago. We both thought it was best then we regretted it. We separated for couple mths which was my decision cause i couldnt cope wit him as i blamed him for it . Was our 1st child. Im now 38 wks pregnant with our second and this time we so much wanted to keep it. Weve been together for 4yrs
It depends on each person stance on the situation. If both people in the relationship want the procedure, it probably won't have any effect. But if the one wanted to keep the baby, and the other didn't, it could surely cause a rift.
I personally know someone who ';died'; twenty years after because she had so much greif. Just like an STD it may not effect you for a while. Don't risk your life. If you don't want the child, just put it up for adoption.
My neighbors had an abortion after having three children and not wanting a fourth. The husband regrets it, but I don't know about the wife. They are still together, 2+ years later.

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