Tuesday, January 19, 2010

How did you stop your adult children from having sexual relationships?

My friend used to show up at his daughter's apartment with a shotgun if he found out a man was there. He justified it by saying all pre-marital sex should be considered rape because young men exploit young women. He said whenever young men date all they think about is how they're going to get the woman to drop her panties no matter how nice a guy they seem.How did you stop your adult children from having sexual relationships?
thats wrong. you cant stop them.. and shouldnt try,


what they do is their business..


they are ADULTS not CHILDREN


and its not rape unless someone says no..


so tell your friend to get over itHow did you stop your adult children from having sexual relationships?
They're adults and if they consent to it, then it's their business. Women can consent to sex just as easily as men do. If your friend keeps doing this to his daughter, he will end up losing her forever. Your friend needs to look up the definition of 'rape'. Rape is not consented sex with both parties. Rape is when someone says, NO and the other does it anyway forcing themselves upon the other.


Now a days, it's not only women that are being raped, (although they are the majority), men are too.


Your friend needs to back off. You cannot stop adults from doing what they want.
my parents instilled in me the values of keeping my virginity. then i made the desicion on my own i wanted to be the good kisd in the school and in the family i never wanted to disappoint mu parents. show your kids that you love and respect them and you want them to be responsible and wait. you can't stop them once they have made the decision but you can help them to make the right decision before it's too late. don't try to scare them out of it they will just hate you for that. let them make that decision on thier own and love them anyway.
An adult can make their own decisions... and just because it's the parent's belief that they shouldn't be having pre-marital sex, doesn't mean it's their child's opinion.





Once they're 18 and out of your house, the only thing you can do from that point is pray that you've taught them well enough to make the right decisions.
Um, your friend has a problem and I am very surprised he hasn't been arrested for assault or locked up in a loony bin about this...if I was his daughter I would be embarrassed to admit he was my father. Heck, I would move and not leave him a forwarding address! Your friend must be from some backward culture to believe he can stop adults (or even pre-adults) from having sex... Might be on track about what guys are after, even the ';nice'; ones, but from what I understand, that was the way humans were designed and if he has an issue, he needs to take it up with his version of his creator...
You shouldn't have to stop them from having sex. If you have done your job as a parent and have properly parented them then you need to trust your parenting. This doesn't mean that they won't make mistakes...problem is that they are adults now and your role has changed from training to supporting.


The days of them having to abide by your rules are unfortunately over and if you try to make them abide by your rules when they are on their own they will grow to resent you and try even harder to do what you don't want them to.
You can't stop them...their ADULTS!!! not children. To some sex is not a sin its human nature and if they want to do it they will. Parents need to know that their kids will grow up and want to make up their own mind about certain things. I guess you just have to hope that the values you taught them growing up will guide them as adults. . Not to mention its not rape if its consensual.
If they're over the age of 18, there isn't much you can do about it except hope that what you taught them growin up sticks. If you're supporing your kids through college (or whatever) you can always threaten to withhold the money but there really isn't a way to enforce it unless you're going to spy on them.
Your friend has issues.
Adults can do whatever they want.
we will talk tham how can be stop tham if we cant stop ourself
You have to allow your adult children to learn from their mistakes and deeds. Once they are over 18 there is not much you can do. You can threaten to disown them and if they are gonna do it they will. All you can do is try to bring them up right with good morals and hope for the best. we all make mistakes in life and learn from them.
Your friends behavior is not only weird, it's against the law. You can't go around harassing other adults with a shotgun to impose your will on them- it doesn't matter if they are your child or not. What did the daughter do when your friend would show up there with a shotgun? Did she call the police? Somebody should have, that's just plain scary behavior.
You don't. Your adult children get to make their own decisions.
oh, while some guys may only think of sex, others don't. You can't stop 2 consenting adults from doing what they want, especially if they have their own place. There should be openness between parent and child, and if this is how the parents treats their adult child I don't even want to think about that poor girls childhood or current relationship with her parents.





And while I do commend her parents for trying to instill moral values in their daughter, they cannot control her life, and it is ultimately her choiceas to what she does.
That's why there's adults and children. Adults are old enough , to be able to do what they want. It's wrong for someone's mom or dad to try to stop them from having sex if they are an adult. They have no business doing that.
You cannot stop your adult children from doing anything! They are ADULTS!





But if you, as a parent, taught them about morals and values from basically birth, then there should be less worry and less psychotic behaviour. If you didn't, then that's the source of your worry and there is nothing to be done now.
Major issues.......seek professional help immediately
Sorry 18 and over. Not the parents problem anymore.
Well you problem lies in your question. If they are ADULTS you can no longer treat them as children. I know from experience what it is like to not want someone you care about to have sex because you know they are not ready. But the simple fact is, you cant stop them. All that you can do is hope that you riased them right and that they will make the right decision on their own. Other than that, all that you can do is sit them down and have an adult conversation and hope that they see your side of it and take your words as wisdom. Good luck!

No comments:

Post a Comment